Non smoking day four

I am exhausted with the pain of lungs, the antibiotics are evil and I refuse to use the inhaler, lest I look like a caravan dwelling asthma-chav.

I am actually over smoking, it no longer occupies my brain, I am so worried about my chest infection, and I couldn't give a flying fuck about fags.

Husband is annoying me on a regular basis, his Aspergers Syndrome and my nicotine withdrawal moods are basically having a silent war. 

This man would make happy nuns punch baby's right in the face.

I have tolerated his weird Aspergers behaviour for years but with my patience being tested lately, I may actually fucking kill him.

Ashley is happy in her refurbished room and has a constant stream of mates coming up, they all sit in there and smoke like fuck, that is starting to bother me as I worry how much carbon monoxide is actually present in that space. But I can't go in there and tell them off about fags as I will look like someone who has found GOD and wants to witness the good news with them, some reformed smokers are a bit like that, but whatever gets you through the day!

This Saturday night I have two full one woman shows back to back, one at 8pm and one at 10pm at the Tron Theatre Glasgow. Am hoping my illness will be gone by then!

A weird thing has happened lately - I have received over 200 emails from folk in Germany and Poland requesting a signed photo, but I soon realised after I googled their home and email address's that they email hundreds of people for ‘signed photo's' with the same ‘ I am such a good fan of yours' shit talk.

It may be some weird scam that I can't figure out, but I am not sending cards to liars. I thought about setting my ‘biggest fans' a task, for example if they send me a photo of them holding my autobiography (they would surely have bought it if they were my biggest fans) then I would send them a signed photo! Seems fair to me? But I didn't do it, as I thought it was churlish.

People who say they are fans can be odd, though I was approached by a lovely lady who set up a Facebook fan page for me, it is very cool and I am so chuffed and people are joining it! I am checking it daily to count how many fans are joining...that's how low my self esteem really is!